Even though Hawaii is the 13th best travel destination in the world according to “Traveleye.com” (which apparently has such an eye for travel that they ranked Orlando, Florida number on the list), I’ve never been there, partly due to the fact that I am a shut-in whose alabaster skin crisps like bacon at even the faintest hint of sunlight. Nevertheless, as a food adventurer, I’m always looking to broaden my culinary horizons and venture across the Pacific to my neighbors in the west. It’s perfect for today’s product, a chocolate treat that Ben picked up from work

I started where any typical American tourist would go: The FAQ page of the Hawaii Tourism Authority website.

Who knew that I don’t even need a passport to visit this tropical paradise because it’s a part of the United States? And they accept US Dollars?! Hot damn! And did you know that anytime of year is a good time to visit Hawaii? That’s unlike the Pacific Northwest where the answer usually is “sometime in June” or frankly “never”.

If you’re sick of co-workers bringing back Hawaiian Host chocolate covered macadamias or repulsed that they brought you Spam flavored nuts, but you’re still looking for a sweet AND salty fix, Big Island Candies Corn Chip Crunch Bar might just be the treat for you.

The Corn Chip Crunch Bar is described by Big Island Candies (or for my sake, BIC) as a “crunchy, sweet and salty delight. With a peanut center filled with corn chips and covered in milk chocolate, you will definitely enjoy this new confection.” I’ve pretty much resigned to calling it “Fritos ‘n’ Chocolate.”

America is all about recreating food into the most easily eatable forms. May I draw your attention to Easy Cheese, Wrigley’s Extra Dessert Delights Gum and of course, KFC’s Double Down. However, the product I’ll be reviewing this weekend is a little red-lidded jar that comes to us all the way from Belgium. Spoiler Alert: This, my friends, is creamy sugary delicious in spread form (no offense Nutella). This is Biscoff Cookie Spread.

As many products that originate in foreign lands, I was initially unaware of what Biscoff actually was before purchasing this product. They’re a small cookie that features sweet blend of cinnamon and caramel flavor that are great with coffee and let you sip and extend your pinky in proper sipping fashion. Now take that a step further: this spread is literally pulverized cookies in spreadable form so you can forget about even using those jaw muscles you have and the arduous task of eating cookies one bite at a time. The label/jar even suggest the truly outrageous idea of dipping a Biscoff cookie into Biscoff spread for a Biscoff explosion of flavor.

Since it mainly consists of dairy & egg-free cookies and oil for smoothing it all out, Biscoff Spread is also vegan and nut-free (it’s the same color as peanut butter but don’t be fooled). Everyone can enjoy sweet European indulgence! They also have a crunchy variety but I have yet to locate it in any local stores (hint to PR folks at Biscoff reading this).

You know how all the Nutella commercials have kids spreading the stuff on bread, waffles and other bland breakfast items? You don’t do that with Biscoff. You take a huge dollop directly from the jar and savor that while you veg out in front the computer or couch (Ben will know this).

Trader Joe’s actually featured a very similar seasonal product recently for Winter 2011 called Speculoos Cookie Butter. It’s the same concept using traditional European Speculoos cookie and pulverized into a creamy spread. If you can’t find Biscoff spread, I would suggest seeing if you local TJs has it. It’s been rumored it’s been reappearing…plus anything worthy of a Facebook Fan Page must be in high demand (Biscoff Spread also has one too).

According to Biscoff’s website, the spread is currently available at Walmart, Paris Grocery Seattle, Giant Food Stores and Cost Plus World Market (though at CPWM it costs $5 as I found out last week). Check it out!

Meh, I ingest enough chemicals as it is.

Product: Snap-N-Glow Pops
Purchased at: Valley Liquidation
Price: 50 cents a bag (2 lollipops/bag)

Ah, novelty sweets – not so much about the candy but the plastic/colorized/motorized container it’s in. From the ever illustrious Ring Pop to the classic Batman spin pop (because what’s more intimidating that the Dark Knight with a giant pink lollipop whirling around above his head), you’re essentially paying for the packaging over the pop. Hence, I had no qualms over dropped 50 cents on a set of suckers that are literally supported by a plastic tube filled with glowing chemicals.

“Snap-N-Glow Pops” is a bit of a misnomer. It’s not the pop that glows, just the stick. And it’s not just that: they’re dim and hard to crack as well. But thanks to Koko’s Confectionery & Novelty (A Division of A & A Global Industries), we now have a product that can serve as both a candy and a disaster preparedness item and/or accessory at an all-night rave.

In a drastic turn from my usual gluttonous style, I didn’t finished eating this product; I didn’t even go past two licks. The hard (yet oddly squishy) had almost fused entirely with their outer plastic wrap and after dealing with that, I was left with an old, outdated sucker that reminded me a lot of those that you purchase from an obnoxious kid through a school fundraising effort. Neither the blue raspberry nor lemon had any outstanding qualities other than being terrible.

Guess I’m just a sucker for disappointment.

While we normally discuss the random assortment of food we eat, we figured it was time to talk about a serious problem facing many Americans today. Since moving into our new apartment, we’ve had trouble with paper towel holders.  The paper towel holder that is pre-installed in our suite is highly effective at dropping the paper towel roll on the floor at the most inconvenient times, risking exposure to germs and loads of cat hair. Just imagine the black-and-white bit of an “As Seen on TV ad”. On the other hand, our brushed steel counter top paper holder was easy on the eyes and very good at keeping our paper towel rolls from hitting the ground. Unfortunately, it was also quite space inefficient. I wanted something that would give me my counter space back, but due to the construction techniques of our vintage (circa 1900) building my stud finder was all but useless, and our heavy plasterboard walls had a pretty good chance of failing under any significant load.

That’s where the U.S. General Magnetic Paper Towel Holder comes into the picture. It’s a simple and sturdy paper towel holder designed to hold paper towels against a large flat object made of steel. Something large, steel, and flat like a gun safe, tool box, or maybe… just maybe a refrigerator! That’s exactly what we needed in our kitchen! Let’s put those fridge doors to use!

Unfortunately, for those of you who have color coordination in mind, the paper towel holders only come in matte red. A more sensible color for a general purpose paper towel holder would have been black or stainless. Both of those colors would work in most places where you could use a magnetic paper towel holder without getting particularly dirty or looking out of place (white would totally get dirty in a work shop). but I can always fire up a can of spray paint and take care of business if I were so inclined.

It’s a beautifully simple tool both in design and construction. There’s nothing magic, nothing fancy, and nothing to break. Just some stamped steel, bolts, and rubberized magnets. However, I did find a potential issue with the construction of these… the edges of the stamped portions don’t seem like they were chamfered or radiused. In fact they feel like they were marginally deburred at best. Definitely a sign of lower quality craftsmanship, but who’s expecting world-class construction from a Harbor Freight product? Just inspect the edges of yours before putting it where children or pets could get to it. I’d hate to recommend a product that lead to someone getting cut or hurt.

Another thing issue that some of you might notice is the sulfurous bouquet given off by the off gassing vulcanized rubber magnets. I’ve been told the smell will dissipate to imperceptible levels in a few days (weeks?) but I’m not 100% sure if that’s just the owners getting used to their kitchens smelling like a tire shop. If you’re sensitive to strong industrial smells you might want to leave this in your garage or on your porch for a few days. Of course if you live in a city like Tacoma your nose is well prepared for strong odors so you’re free to use it right away.

Even when you take the relatively simple construction and the strong rubber smell, I think these are an invaluable kitchen gadget for people who are tight on space. The magnets are surprisingly decent and do an excellent job, in part thanks to their rubber coating, of keeping your paper towels in place while remaining weak enough that you can easily change an empty roll out for a fresh one without breaking a sweat.  [editor's note: if you own a stainless steel refrigerator you might find that this particular product won't work on your doors. Many stainless steel kitchen appliances don't have enough ferrous metal in the composition of their steel so magnets just don't stick.]

Even for the relatively steep price of $7.50 the U.S. General Paper Towel Holder is a fantastic purchase for a small kitchen. Assuming you don’t mind having a paper towel roll sticking out of your fridge. It might not be fancy, but it sure does a good job, and I’ll say I have absolutely no buyers remorse purchasing this. I’m even thinking about picking up a U.S. General Magnetic Rubber Glove holder since we go through a fair amount of gloves when we’re doing meat prep or cleaning up the kitchen. It’s no edible disaster, nor is it particularly cheap. Instead it’s a reasonably priced kitchen gadget that manages to be more useful than a banana guard or a Slap Chop.

[editor's note: how do you feel about reviewing the occasional kitchen gadget along side mystery meats and discounted delights?] 

While I’m hardly a wine connoisseur (as you’ll see in a bit by the bottles I picked up), there are loads to choose from. If you can’t decide, there’s even a handy Grocery Outlet specific guide here (using GO’s other nickname “Gross Out”). You can tell how cheap Ben and I are when he scoffed that $6 was still too much for a bottle; guess he’s used to the $3 Chuck at Trader Joe’s. In addition to my normal shopping, I did end up splurging on a couple of bottles to tide me over in the meantime. Here’s some goods we ended up spotting and documenting for your reading pleasure:

1. Sweet Pea Apple Wine with Blackberry Flavor ($2.99 + 20% off) and Chocolate Shop – The Chocolate Lover’s Wine, Red Wine with Natural Dark Chocolate Flavor ($9.99 + 20% off)

As you can tell, I’m a sucker for novelty labels and things that may or may not fall under the defintion of “wine”. While I figure that the apple-blackberry wine is probably akin to a tart, slightly alcoholic juice, I’ve been duped before (Google “Chocovine Reviews” for more fun). Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.

2. Chorizo Chipotle Corn Nuts, 4 oz bag – 69 cents

Because we haven’t seen the likes of these since we did one of our very first reviews on the same product back in January 2011. I don’t really expect these to last long in our cupboard since we’re not reviewing them again and they are full of spicy, meaty deliciousness.

3. Crying Tiger Ramen Noodle Soup, Beef Flavor – 15 cents

I’d be lying if I said we purchased it for reasons other that the name “Crying Tiger” but it looks like a standard beef ramen (a taste test will tell the truth). Oddly enough, the tiger on the package isn’t even crying, much less is he even disappointed that his face and species is attributed to a pack of cheap ramen.

4. BetterOats Mom’s Best Naturals Maple & Brown Sugar flavor and Lavish Dark Chocolate Oatmeal with Flax – 50 cents each

Next to the wholesome Mom-approved/”Mom’s Best” brand, the Lavish oatmeal looks downright seductive. Ben buys snacks for his co-workers to sample from his workspace so he figured he’d get a healthy alternative to the norm of Super Mario & My Little Pony fruit snacks, though I can’t say how healthy dark chocolate oatmeal (with flax!) might be.

5. Belly Flops Irregular Jelly Beans (aka Jelly Belly factory rejects), one pound – $2.99

Nothing like buying a product with the word “irregular” in the name (besides Metamucil and Ex-Lax). On closer inspection, the bag contains things like conjoined twin Buttered Popcorns and snake-like Green Apples, so if anything you’re getting more candy per bite! Jelly Belly says: “Belly Flops are no less flavorful, or lovable, than regular Jelly Belly jelly beans; they just come in wild shapes and sizes. You may find one that’s round, one that’s square, or you may even find a bunch stuck together. On very rare occasions, a flavor may not match a color. A red Belly Flop might taste like Blueberry, or a white one might taste like Chocolate Pudding. Crazy!”

BONUS: THE NOTEBOOK LIMITED EDITION GIFT SET – $9.99

Stickers! Stationery! Bookmarks! Ryan Gosling! Here’s a great one star review I found on Amazon.com:

“I borrowed my sister in laws DVD of this movie cause everyone told me how romantic it was. What they neglectecd to inform me was that it was an emotional roller coaster through out the movie in which I wanted to kick my tv, plus I didnt know I’d need to watch it with a whole box of tissues. I was either mad or cried throughout the entire movie! But I figured it was ok as long as it had a happy ending. I’m not gonna say too much there for those of you who hasnt see it yet, but what the heck was that ending about? That was soooo sad I was blubbering like a baby. Needless to say, after the movie I was so upset I actually threw the remote control. I have now boycotted the movie from my house. A little drastic you say? Not to somebody who used an entire box of kleenex throughout the movie. In closing, hated the movie! Watch at your own risk. (and with tissues)”

Have a great week everyone. Enjoy St. Patrick’s Day, don’t imbibe too much and we’ll be back next week with another review.

I’d like to think I’m somewhat of an Andrew Zimmern of the grocery store, but instead of indulging in durian (me: done), snake penis (me: maybe) and balut (me: no way), I sample possibly expired treats, discontinued finds and occasionally unfamiliar territory. Also, Mr. Zimmern – you owe me big time for blatantly advertising your show right there.

I’m not too familiar with Hispanic candies, though I’ve browsed through popular choices like hot & spicy mango lollipops and those little tubs of flavored powder at our local market (they also sell pork rinds [chicharones] here at big as your forearm – Atkins dieters rejoice). So as something that’s previously unfamiliar to me, I’ll be using Google and Wikipedia to do some research; I’m also writing this at 5am so it’s a bit of déjà vu from my college years (thank you Wikipedia for helping me spell déjà vu right there).

What you may not know is, over the past few years a variety of candies have been removed from shelves due to possible lead contamination in the packaging. I noticed this list had “Pelon roller tamarind flavored syrup candy” on it – so I hope I don’t get an extra surprise with my purchase. For those of you worried about me, Wikipedia notes “As of July 2008, this and other similar Mexican candies are safe to eat.”

Tamarind isn’t widely used in American candy (then again, neither is spicy chili powder), but it’s the main component of this candy. The liquid tamarind roller candy is so popular it even has its own Wikipedia page.

Even those this candy is a liquid (sugar, water, glucose, chili powder, citric acid, xanthan gum, and tamarind extract), you don’t squeeze it into your mouth as much as you roll it with the circular application tip. Without risking this sounding like a set of tampon instructions, I’ll stop right there for my sake.

Contrary to the label that the candy is “Mucho Fun!”, it smelled and tasted like the sticky liquid you find pooled and encrusted underneath the ketchup, mustard and mayo bottles sitting in your fridge door. It was not an enjoyable experience, so suffice to say, it was no mucho fun. The brown color of the syrupy liquid didn’t really help that fact.

Now I expect to get some feedback from folks who have grown up with this candy and love it to death, but it really didn’t jive with me. I don’t care for the idea of any liquid candy and I think the tamarind flavor works much better in drinks and other foods.

Grocery Outlet (in Lakewood) still has a whole mess of these sitting in their candy aisle, waiting to be purchased by adventurous people like our dear readers. Try one if you’re inclined to roll a sticky, sour liquid on tongue (that’s all the innuendo you get for today). Happy Friday!

I can parade around and claim that pâté is some sort of sophisticated French meat product made animal fat and protein. Well, it technically is a cooked meat product made out of animal fat and protein and some forms of it are considered sophisticated. Well, most of the stuff that bears the label pâté in the states is relatively sophisticated. I’m not talking about deviled hams, or potted meats though they are extremely similar (same thing just different levels of quality). Here in the states you’ll find that most pates are seasoned with all sorts of herbs and spices and they make for a mighty fine cracker spread.

Pâté Doesn’t Sound so Bad. What’s the Deal with this Army Brand Stuff? 

I’m no stranger to potted, deviled, and processed meat. In fact I love most of them. I think deviled ham is the bees knees, Spam is a regular in my cabinet, and like I mentioned before, I like pâté. while cruising the Eastern European section of my local Saar’s Market I noticed a wide selection of pâté from former Warsaw Pact nations such as Poland, and Bulgaria. It was a pretty exciting moment for me, since I could try out an even wider selection of strange and exciting pulverized meat products, along with a variety of Nutella knockoffs.

Now I don’t have the time or finances to buy up every $2.00 can of pâté so I opted for the craziest, largest, and most awesomely named can of pâté. It’s a totally safe strategy, right?

Wrong. It tastes like, well, it tastes like someone took all of the best parts of the pig and threw them in the trash. This person then took the remainder of the pig, mechanically separated it from the rest of the carcass, allowed it to sit in a vat of fat for far too long. After the meat absorbed the essence of meat packing factory it was tinned (without any spices I might add) where it sat in a warehouse for 15 years before being shipped off for some dumb American to eat it because it has an awesome label.

For something with such a mild flavor it sure tastes like garbage, and the flavor just doesn’t go away. I had approximately one teaspoon of Army Brand Sergeant’s Pork Pate and it took hours to get the flavor off of my tongue. I tried bacon. I tried beer. I tried bacon and beer at the same time. After the powerful flavors of the beer and bacon wore off that oily-fleshy-horrible flavor would bubble back into my mouth. Every time I exhaled the flavor was in my mouth. Festering away.

Army Brand Sergeant’s Pork Pate has done more to damage my faith in meat products than all of the PETA, American Heart Association, and FDA labeling combined.

It would not surprise me in the slightest if this was of a vegetarian conspiracy to ruin meat products for adventurous meatatarians. My faith in the canned meat industry has been shaken to the very core.

It truly is one of the least appetizing food product’s I’ve consumed for Clearance Cuisine. I put it up there with  the toluene flavored Burger King Hot Fries, and Too Tarts Melted Ice Cream Spray lubricant.

One of my cherished moments as a child was the neighborhood ice cream truck. And not just the truck itself – the thrill of hearing a constant repeat of “Pop Goes the Weasel”, “Turkey in the Straw” or the classic Scott Joplin piece “The Entertainer” becoming louder and louder as the truck traveled closer to my neighborhood. Mind you, the music didn’t mean we would be going to be visited by the truck, since our neighborhood was a looped dead-end that saw the truck less often than we did a new year.

When we (my brother and I) could confirm the truck was actually headed towards us, we made the mad dash of emptying pig banks, scraping through the couch and grabbing those quarters out of conveniently placed spare change dishes.

Looking back, the selection was always generally underwhelming: maybe some Ninja Turtles with bubble gum eyes or a Mickey Mouse novelty molded to include ears. In fact, most of the treats were just popsicles instead of actual ice cream. But jack up the price of those suckers by 1000% and you’ve got scores of kids chasing after your vehicle. A $1 treat from the truck always tasted better that a Fudgesicle from Fred Meyer that your mom bought in a 48 pack.

Oh boy, fat free with natural* colors and flavors!

Liquid Sugar, High Fructose Corn Syrup and Corn Syrup.

Sadly, now I’m too old to go chasing after ice cream trucks and buying things made of pure sugar that aren’t Starbucks Frappacinos. However, I am not immune to bright colors and movie tie-ins (the children’s cereal aisle is a no-fly zone for me) so I couldn’t resisted buying IRON MAN’S FACE – in popsicle form.

Contrary to my usual modus operandi, I actually have seen Iron Man 2, instead of catching it when it appears on Saturday night basic cable. I can appreciate Robert Downey Jr.’s sarcastic character and Scarlett Johansson’s skintight leather, though I’m not sure the target audience of this product would.

I AM IRON MAN.

Iron Man’s big identity reveal in the film was a little more well-received that this unveiling. Poor frozen novelty Iron Man didn’t hold up too well after melting a bit in my grocery bag and refreezing in the meantime.

Iron Man’s face was a sickly syrupy sweet frozen mass of cherry and lemon. If you’ve ever had a “Firecracker” Popsicle, this pop was reminiscent of the first two cherry and lemon sections. All in all, a syrupy sweet artificial tasting frozen novelty that’ll make your heart race and possibly overload your Arc Reactor.

UPDATE – Last time I visited Grocery Outlet, the price of the remaining stock of these had been updated to 8/$1 or 12/$1, can’t remember which.

I recently remembered an intense conversation I had with a friend that took place years ago at a local popular Chinese buffet (shout out to Super Buffet in Dupont) on the topic of shrimp. As we peeled the clear shells off of our chilled crustaceans, she mused how gross it was to see the shrimp’s visible intestinal tract (now you know) before popping it into her mouth. Now even though that tube is pretty much filled with algae, plankton and other harmless goo, she just had to take it a step farther, splitting open the shrimp’s back and rubbing the brown innards between her fingers.

Recently, I picked up a box of veggie shrimp scampi (seen before) partly prompted by my buffet experience but also because I wondered what in the world faux shrimp could be made out of.

Now I am not vegetarian, but I’ve dabbled with all sorts of meat substitutes, just for experimentation. Things like the good old veggie burger/Gardenburger, Boca Burgers, weird soy based “ribs” covered with a goopy sauce, Chik’n nuggets but also less processed choices like tofu, seitan and TVP. These veggie shrimp are composed not of soy or grains, but glucomannan (used in lots of weight-control related foods), potato starch and whey protein. Nom nom.

Obviously creating shrimp from starches is gonna bump the carbs up and knock the protein down (an impressive 1g per serving) but nevertheless, it’s a low calorie meal at 200 calories per box.

Click for large.

The box including the vacuum-sealed packet of “shrimp” (lovingly colored red with paprika extract) and a goopy packet of scampi sauce, made with garlic purée and canola oil. I’m glad they didn’t pre-mix them, because I can only take so much sauce with my meat-and-seafood free shrimp.

The contents.

Prep was pretty easy. The veggie shrimp is already pre-cooked so I took the liberty of using the fancy, non-bachelor route of actually putting the ingredients in a sauté pan as opposed to zapping it in the microwave.

This is another one of those products that I cannot find any official listing on the manufacturer’s site so I’ll go ahead and assume it’s discontinued, given the absence of information and the overabundance of these at my local Grocery Outlet recently (I saw the veggie tuna on sale last week for a measly 50 cents a box, so I might have to pick up one of those as well).

I cooked the shrimp until they were deemed “cooked” (lukewarm, in this case) and dosed them out on a plate. I did cook them with the included sauce, but only about a fourth of the packet, as to preserve the delicate glucomannan and potato starch flavor.

As far as the taste and texture goes, I was pleasantly surprised. The veggie shrimp successfully obtained a chewy, meaty texture without being too gummy or crumbly. They did have a slight fishy flavor, which I’m curious how this happened without using actual fish (anyone want to weigh in?).

I didn’t really care for the scampi sauce. Unlike the scampi I’m used to, it was mainly canola oil as opposed to butter which gave it a slick, greasy taste. Note that I didn’t eat the veggie shrimp with any sort of pasta or rice as suggested, but I imagine those would soak up a bit of the oil.

All in all, an interesting concept but looks like it didn’t catch on. I probably wouldn’t buy these again, mainly because I don’t feel real shrimp are that unhealthy (but I am a meat eater after all) and they’re definitely more filling due to the protein content. Worth a try though if you’re vegetarian and looking for something fishy.

Other Reviews for Yves Veggie Cuisine Shrimp Scampi:
Adventures in Fake Meat
Vegetablog

In preparation for the proposed 5-10″ of SNOWMAGEDDON or the equally frightening SNOWPOCALYPSE, as it’s been called around here (I assume East Coasters think we’re nuts), I hopped on the bus to stock up on some consumables so we wouldn’t resort to ripping open the extra MREs we have or indulging in canned tomatoes or sardines and/or herring in oil.

I hate to play favorites, but like a mother with a gaggle of kids, I do have a Grocery Outlet store that I prefer and that is the 6th Ave location. It’s closest to me, has a great selection of goods and a staff that’s always very nice.

Here’s some new stuff I spotted (and for the most part, purchased) in preparation for the big one:

1. Infinite Varieties of Lindt Chocolate Bars (Intense Mint, Intense Orange, 70% Cocoa, 85% Cocoa, Chili, White Coconut, plus loads of truffles and milk chocolate bars) – $1.99

I used to be crazy about the 85% Lindt bars. This chocolate was like the Holy Grail to the low carb community, due to its low sugar content (5g net carbs per serving, why the heck do I still know this?) but still palatable taste (though some would argue that 85% is still pretty bitter). Anywho, they reformulated the 85% bar in 2011 and lo and behold, IT NOW HAS NINE NET CARBS OH THE HUMANITY (I kid, LC dieters. Keep doin’ what you do).

I still enjoy the bar, but this time picked up the Chili flavor as well, which is a delightfully peppery bar that’s around 70% cocoa. Chocolate purists will discount the White Coconut bar, since it’s not “real” chocolate, but it’s good if you’re feeling gluttonous and apathetic.

They also had these Hageland Dark Chocolate Pear & Almonds bars for around the same price. The name didn’t ring a bell, so I did a little researching. Apparently Hageland is a brand developed exclusively for Walmart, and this bar has been review a couple times online as well. Not too sure how well pear flavor would mesh with dark chocolate, but I may pick up a bar next time I’m there.

2. Rice Dream Supreme Chocolate Chai Shelf-Stable Beverage: Dairy Free, Soy Free, Cholesterol Free, Trans Fat Free and Gluten free for your pleasure – 75 cents

Gotta love shelf-stable dairy/dairy-esque products. I’ve meant to try this stuff, but my lower carb/no sugar habits have guilted me so far(says the person who just bought a handful of chocolate bars). This stuff is also $36 for a pack of 12 on Amazon so you can stock up for the next Snowmadeggon/Snopocalypse/Snowtastrophe at a fraction of the price.

3. Cascade Ice Sparkling Cocktail Mixer Lemon Drop – 59 cents

I’ve picked up 2-3 bottles of this so far but ashamedly just drank it as a soda, instead of mixing a fancy Hollywood Martini Drink, mostly out of laziness and thirst (don’t judge me). Essentially, it’s a fizzy lemon soda that caffeine free and sweetened by sucralose (Splenda) so it’s low-calorie. Now where’s that bottle of Bloody Mary Mix to go with my lunch?

4. Edy’s/Nestle Drumstick Sundae Cone Ice Cream (Snack Size) - 50 cents

Because you know that box of regular sized Drumstick cones in your freezer will be gone within the next few days, especially if you’re cooped up inside because of the snow. With what other dessert could you get “chocolaty dipped waffle cone pieces” (note the spelling of chocolaty – that’s not a misprint) and only 130 delicious sugar-laden calories? Only problem is with a real Drumstick, you reach a chocolate cache in the bottom of the cone (which is officially called a Super Nugget), a small paper cup only provides a flat white ending. Both provide delicious Propylene Glycol Monostearate however.

So what is the best snow day snack?