I was never much of a rebel in my teenage years, unless you count being extremely awkward, blasting Beatles music and driving a Ford Taurus while mindfully obeying the speed limit as rebellious. I’ve had to force myself to settle for eating candy made by THE MAN and culture conforming candy corporations. I have no idea why these candy rocks may be rebellious, other than that fact that they use not one but two forms of sugar and lots of delicious food dyes to achieve their semiprecious stone look. You can have your “fair trade-organic-90% cacao” whatever, I’m gonna be hardcore and eat straight up sugar and coloring to get my candy fix.
According an online candy retailer, sadly Rebel Rocks have been discontinued. Fortunately you can still pick up a single pack for 25 cents at Valley Liquidation (I think a whole box is ~6 bucks). If the idea of eating pure sugar and corn syrup fashioned into pretty little stones doesn’t appeal to you, you can always slap some of them onto a bracelet and sell it as fine jewelry at some local art gallery for a 1000% profit markup. Everyone wins! (I’m tempted to buy a whole case of these for an art project. It worked for Tacoma.)
Tags: Candy, Valley Liquidation
