PLOM·BO [plahm-boh]
– noun
1. Ice cream product manufactured in Daugavpils Latvia, a Baltic country and former USSR republic. Available in five different flavors: (vanilla cream with chocolate chunks in waffle cup, vanilla cream with walnuts and caramel in waffle cup, vanilla cream in waffle cup, chocolate cream in waffle cup, vanilla cream with raisins in waffle cup)
2. Uncle character on popular family sitcom, frequently seen wearing wifebeater, boxer shorts and a look of confusion. Constantly causing general mayhem and wackiness.
Uncle Plombo relieves himself in a Ming Dynasty era vase.
Mom and Dad in unison: “Oh that Uncle Plombo!”
3. Slang (verb): Taught a lesson (the hard way), to lose humiliatingly.
In response to a friend losing at an online MMMORG: “YOU JUST GOT PLOMBO’D!”
To be honest, I bought this product solely because it originates from Latvia. To those who do not know me, I happen to be half-Latvian. Unfortunately, I have never been to Latvia (yet) so I figured this product may help me to “connect with my roots”.
My dad tried one of these cones a couple weeks ago when I mentioned there was a freezer at Saar’s overflowing with them. Interested, he selected one of the “vanilla cream with chocolate chunks” flavors. Sadly, due to some printing error, confusion or just plain laziness, there were no chocolate chunks to be found in his “soggy” cone (his words, not mine). He mentioned that while the ice cream did taste good, the cone itself was pretty pathetic to look at and that the price should have been something like 4-5 cones/$1 instead of 99 cents each.
I picked up the three flavors that were available at Saar’s: plain vanilla, vanilla with chocolate chunks and vanilla with walnuts and caramel. I admit I was a bit nervous since the product is not at all visible through the packaging.
My dad was right – the cone is really not that impressive. The ice cream barely comes above the top edge of the cone. Ah well, looks aren’t everything. I can excuse it since it had to make a cross-country journey to get here. After my first bite (soggy cone included, could be that way because of the potato starch listed in the ingredients?), something was a little off. Yes, it was creamy and sweet, but definitely a more “artificial” flavor compared to your standard Breyers or Dreyers. And that’s when we noticed “vegetable fat” as one of the ingredients (second one, in fact) in the “ice cream”, no cream to be found. Also, as you can see with our truly scientific dissections in the photos, there’s really not much in the way of pieces of chocolate or “caramel walnuts” either.
These aren’t terrible if you’re looking to satisfy an ice cream craving, but take note it’s going to be more like a pseudo-McDonald’s soft serve than a gourmet treat. At 99 cents, you might as well invest that towards some Haagen Dazs or Ben & Jerry’s.
(Ice cream ingredients, for reference: water, vegetable fat, sugar, skim milk powder, dextrose. Waffle cup: flour, potato starch, eggs, vegetable oil, salt, baking soda. Yum!)
